Hypothyroidism, weightloss, disappointment, and success

I have hypothyroidism.  It sucks.  Energy draining, slow weight loss, hair loss, cold hands, tired...the list goes on.   I found out I was hypo about 10 years ago.  I had been putting on weight.  Being an avid gym rat this was unusual for me.  I was also feeling more and more tired - sleeping any chance I got.  Hours and hours of sleep without feeling rested.   I went from a healthy 110 lb 5 foot tall girl to 145 lbs, tired, and exhausted...within two months.  Despite my low calorie diet and running 2-3 miles during the week I was still gaining.  I finally saw my doctor and I was tested...I had something called hypothyroidism.   Fantastic. I cried.  I was happy to have an answer but also knew that I was going to have to deal with the for the rest of my life. 
My first question was, what exactly is hypothyroidism?  Your thyroid is a butterfly shaped gland that assists with hormones and metabolism.  When your thyroid is under-active (hypothyroid)  it is not producing enough hormones, therefore making your metabolism slow. I'm lucky in the sense that my is on the low end of the spectrum.  Some people develop far worse complications with an autoimmune disorder called Hashimoto's.  Currently, there is no real cure.  Most of us with thyroid issues are on medications like synthroid or naturethroid.  Others may need to have their thyroid removed or partially removed.  Over all, I am lucky to only need medication.

My first medication was synthroid.  I had been on it for years.  Then I stumbled across the book Hypothyroid, Health, and Happiness by Steven F. Hotze, MD.  It has changed so much for me.  As I was reading it, I nearly came to tears because how I was feeling, was in that book.  Despite having normal labs, I still felt "off."  I honestly thought it was something I was going to have to live with for the rest of my life....and what I have been living with for the past 10 years.  In this book, Hotze really dives in and explains everything for you.  He is also a big advocate for desiccated thyroid medication.  It's something I had never quite thought about before.  I mean - why would I want to switch when my labs have been normal.  The more I read the more I wondered why I wouldn't.  I mean - the natural medications have been working for YEARS!  And here I was taking something synthetic.  So I talked to my doctor and he hesitantly agreed to switch me.
What a difference!  First thing I've noticed is that my brain fog is gone.  I'm starting to feel like the old me again.  My weightloss, although slow, is happening.  That is success in my opinion!  I'm actually feeling rested and happier.  Your thyroid is a funny thing.  Most people think it effects just your thyroid and metabolism.  It's so much more than that.  Energy levels, hair loss, depression, digestion, sleep, mood, libido.... the list goes on.  Today - yes, I have hypothyroidism.  Yes I'm overweight.  Yes I get more tired than usual.  But I am growing as a person.  I've learned to deal with this in a way that works for me.  Weightloss is happening, sleep is improving, energy is improving and I am happier.  While my weightloss my be slow and at times, disappointing, I will succeed.  I will not be controlled by my thyroid.  I will control my thyroid. 

Sources:
Hypothyroid, Health and Happiness by Steven F. Hotze, MD
http://thyroid.about.com

Losing the Baby Weight....

Let me start off by saying I'm VERY nervous!  The last time I did this journey, I dropped 35 lbs and ended up pregnant!  What a blessing in disguise!  Well, Squish is now 6 weeks old and growing like a weed. With Hot Rod, I did NOT work out.  I thought that breast feeding would magically make me lose all the weight I had gained.  It didn't work!  This time, I'm taking a more effective approach.  Healthy eating and exercising.  I started on Monday.  Today was day three.  I'm doing the Les Mills Pump program and truly loving it.
I have everything planned out but am a little nervous about a few weekends I will be out of town.  Also a little nervous about days off.  Do you ever take days off and find it hard to get back into it?  I think I will have to do something like yoga or go for a walk.  My biggest obstetrical though, will be working out on days when the boys are not wanting to cooperate.  Or when I'm so tired from staying up all night all I want to do is sleep.  I also hope that the days where the work outs are longer wont be too bad.  No matter what, I'm determined to do them.  I made a promise to myself to complete this program.  What choice do I have?  I want to be healthier, making excuses wont get me where I want to be!  Speaking of excuses....
Food will be another obstacle.  I can  always find an excuse to not eat healthy. "Not home"  "don't have anything healthy on me"  "this junk food will be easier..."  The list could go on.  Oh, you parents out there, do you ever use the "my child wanted to eat at this crappy restaurant with the amazing french fries" excuse?  Yup - can you say Chik Fil A?  #3, no pickles, waffle fries and a small chocolate shake.  It is my weakness.  Time to clean up the eating though!  Abs are made in the kitchen!  I'm going to start keeping track of my eating through Myfitnesspal.com.  If you'd like to follow me, feel free too!  You can find me under the name "CoachrosieT."    Want to keep me on my toes or cheer me?  Follow me on Instagram.  I'll post accountability, motivational, and status updates.   I am also under the name "coachrosiet."
So here's to a new journey.  One that certainly wont be easy but also one I'm not willing to let myself give up on.  Not doing this is not an option.  I want to do this for my boys.  I want my old body back.  I want to be confident!  Now, I'm off to catch some Zzzz's.  I'm tired! 

The Three Degrees of Exercise for Cancer Treatment (guest blogger)

I was recently contacted by Melanie Bowen  regarding an article she had written.  With cancer effecting so many people, I couldn't turn it down!  Melanie is currently a Master's student with a passion that stems from her grandmother's cancer diagnosis. She often highlights the great benefits of alternative nutritional, emotional, and physical treatments on those diagnosed with cancer or other serious illness.  To read more from Melanie, visit her blog for the Mesothelioma Cancer Alliance. In her spare time, you can find Melanie trying new vegan recipes, on her yoga mat, or spending time with her family.  

I highly recommend you visiting her blog.  There is so much more information.  Without further ado.... Here is melanie's article!  Thanks again Melanie! 

The Three Degrees of Exercise for Cancer Treatment

In each stage of cancer treatment and recovery, exercise plays an important role in replenishing the body with nutrients, oxygen and eliminating the waste products of metabolism. Numerous Studies on exercise and cancer have identified the enormous benefits that deep breathing, stretching and aerobic exercise can provide. To gain the benefits of exercise safely, consult your physician on your exercise plan of care.

Beginner – Breathing Exercises

Breathing exercises are a great way for patients looking to begin a regular exercise routine. It is a simple activity that should not leave you breathless and can be done practically anywhere. Deep breathing prevents the collapsing of air sacs in the lungs and promotes the exchange of oxygen in the blood. For certain cancer patients, such as those with a prognosis of mesothelioma, respiratory function may be impaired making strenuous activities more difficult. Due to this complication, breathing exercises are an ideal place to start.

Incorporating deep breathing is vital to ensure the body cells are supplied with adequate oxygen for healing, normal function and eliminating waste products. Breathe in slowly through the nose until the maximum amount of lung volume is achieved. Slowly exhale via pursed lips until the lungs are sufficiently empty. By doing so, patients will strengthen their lung function which will improve blood flow and circulation, and overall quality of life.

Moderate – Yoga

For those who are recovering and regaining strength, taking on moderate exercise such as yoga is the next important step of the healing process. This level of activity may be described as breaking a sweat after about ten minutes of motion and being able to converse without being out of breath.

Yoga is being recognized and acknowledged the medical community. In fact, numerous studies have suggested the benefits of yoga for cancer patients. These benefits include decreased fatigue, improved blood flow and circulation, improved flexibility, mood, and sleep. Yoga programs are now offered by cancer centers as an supplement to traditional cancer therapies. There are many different variations of yoga such as, power yoga, kundalini yoga, bikram yoga, and tibetan yoga, some of which that may be more suitable than others.

Advanced – Weight Lifting

In the later stages of recovery, advanced exercises such as weight training, are important for you to regain muscle mass, strength and stamina. This level of exercise will result in rapid and deep breathing, a sweat after a few minutes and eventually a light sweat as the body adjusts to the level of activity. Medical interventions and long periods of inactivity can atrophy muscles and decrease endurance. Prostate, stomach and cancer of the head and neck frequently reduce the amount of skeletal muscle. The National Cancer Institute recommends that survivors use strengthening exercises to restore the muscle loss.

Weight lifting has seen some promising results in the breast cancer community. Many women experience lymphedema or swelling of the arms, due to a build of lymph, after surgery. Studies have shown that women who engage in weight training can reap many benefits, including alleviating lymphedema. Even after you have received a clean bill of health, staying physically fit and maintaining a healthy body should always remain a clear and constant goal.

Exercise for All Stages of Cancer Recovery

Exercise can help heal, regain strength and improve endurance in all stages of cancer recovery. Exercise should not be viewed as an activity that only fit people engage in. Regular physical activity has shown benefits for even those recently diagnosed, in treatment, or in recovery. It is important you consult a physician when employing any exercise into a plan of care. Maximize the benefits of a high-quality life with the benefits of exercise.

My unplanned HBAC

Friday morning was like every other morning.  My son came in around 6:45 and snuggled for a bit.  He eventually told me it was time to get up and eat.  No problemo.  I was feeling FAB-U-LOUS! As I was hopping out of bed, I felt something "pop."  I thought it was weird but whatever.  I went to the bathroom but felt like I still had to go.  I did a little bit and wondered - that couldn't be my water could it?  I wasn't feeling any pain and I had an appointment with my midwife in a few hours so knew I'd just discuss it with her.   In the meantime, I had a chinchilla cage to clean!  I quickly made a shake for breakfast and got to work. Unfortunately, I had to stop a dozen times so that I could use the restroom - and quickly realized my pants were pretty wet.  So I changed and started doing some laundry.  Around this time I started feeling some contractions but they weren't breathtaking or anything so I kept going.   At 9:00, we headed to the midwifes place.  
I've always taken my son with me.  Even though he is two, I felt it was important for him to be as involved as possible with the coming of the new baby.  He really enjoyed hearing the babies heart beat and looked forward to doing so whenever we went.   Well, when I explained to Heather (my midwife) what was going on she wanted to check me out and make sure it was my water breaking and nothing more serious.  Just as I figured, it was my water breaking.  What was a surprise was that I was already 4 centimeters dilated!  With my son I was in agony at this point!  Now, I was casually walking about, pausing for contractions, and moving on.  From here the plan was to go to the chiropractor and then go for a walk. 
10:30  we were at the chiropractor.   Dr. Gregg adjusted me and wished me well.   Then we headed home and it was like a light switch.  No longer was I the pregnant friendly goddess about to have an angelic labor.   Oh no... I was horrid.  Snappy and cranky, I just wanted to be alone in the shower.   This is where things got intense.  Mike wanted to call our doula, Lindsey, but I said no.  It was her sons birthday and I didn't want to interrupt.   Another 10 minutes goes by and I'm in agony.  The shower isn't helping, a bath isn't helping and Mike is giving me no choice and sends Lindsey a message to come over.   During this time I give up on the water and head to the other, MUCH smaller bathroom and sit backwards on the toilet.
This provides little, if any relief.  I'm begging for an epi because it hurts so bad.  Mike tells me no, I didn't want one.  I just sat here wondering "if it is this bad this early - how can I possibly go until I'm in full labor?"  Well, Lindsey comes in and calmes me down and helps me through the next contraction.  Mike takes Rod to my parents house.  While he's gone (it felt like FOREVER) my contractions came so fast and then I felt it....The ring of fire.   I though" ...noooo....this can't be it....already?"  My next thought was "I fell in to a burning ring of fire...."  no joke.  Not sure why that song popped into my head but it helped get me through the next couple of contractions.  I didn't think I was close because who thinks of stupid stuff like that when they are about to deliver?
Apparently I do.  I told Lindsey I felt like pushing.  Mike wasn't back yet but she said it was time to go.  I tried to stand and said I couldn't.  There was no way I could move, there was so much pressure!   Lindsey tried to get me to move again...saying "we deliver here or at the hospital"   I told her it would be here because this baby was coming.  It was the coolest thing.  I could actually feel the baby moving down.  I felt something happening and reached in between my legs.  I COULD FEEL HIS HEAD!   I told Lindsey and at this time Mike walked in.  She asked Mike if he could feel the head.  He reached down and said yes.  She immediately instructed Mike to grab some towels and call 911.   I had another contraction, partially stood and pushed out his head.  Immediate relief!  I thought he was out but Lindsey said to keep pushing.  A few more and pushes and he was out! Next thing I know, the paramedics were here and I was in complete shock.  I couldn't believe I just pushed out my baby!  I felt EVERYTHING.  It was probably the scariest most euphoric feeling I've ever had. Very cool!
We ended up declining the ambulance ride and instead went to the Midwifes clinic.  Baby and I were checked out.  I had a 2nd degree tear but that is NOTHING compared to a c section!  I was also given an amazing herbal bath that I loved! We were home by 7:00.  Felt good not to be tied up in a hospital and to be home with my little family!
All in all, it took less than 6 hours.  I didn't even get a chance to call my photographer.  I'm bummed about that but am glad that my doula and I took some pictures.  Yup - I took pictures.  right after the baby was born, in all my glory - I took some pictures of Mike cutting the cord!  We didn't get these with Rod so it was important to get them now!  :)   Our second son, Holden, was born healthy, beautiful and happy.  :)  It was an amazing experience and I would do it all over again!  <3  My family is perfect!

The difference between Pregnancy #1 and #2

As I've stated before, my first pregnancy resulted in 70 lbs weight gain, water retention, and a terrible diet with no exercise.  The end result?  An emergency  c section and a body that did not go back to pre baby weight.  Although - I did get 10 lbs away before I got pregnant again! 
Anyways, it just so happened that I found a picture on my facebook album that had me pregnant with #1 at 34 weeks and 5 days.  I had to take a picture with #2 and compare!  I was amazed and my midwife couldn't believe it! 

I do feel different and so much happier that I am feeling better with this pregnancy.  It gives me hope for a VBAC and hope for a successful weight loss after baby is born.  I wont lie though, this third trimester is kicking my tushy!  My cravings are simply insane and I am feeling very tired.   I know it's just how pregnancy works but wow...   I've decided to become a little more strict when it comes to sleeping.  In bed by 10, read a book, knit, whatever but no tv, facebook or anything else.  I usually read.  Right now, I'm reading The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren.    The sleep schedule is really helping.  I also am staying strict with my diet.  I have too.  I worked way to hard to have a healthy pregnancy through this that I wont give up now!

So thats my update for now.  It is possible to make a difference in your pregnancy and your life!  Feel free to message me if you have any questions!

Some People Suck....

Today there was a free spouses spa night that was pretty fun.   Then I found out someone was making a comment about my booty.  I've always had a booty.  Even when I was 105 lbs - still shapely and out there.  Never bugged me.  But tonight, when I found out a nasty comment was made....I was pretty much upset.  I am not where I want to be weight wise, and not worrying about it right now since I'm pregnant, but I am smaller than I used to be.  It bothers me because it's kind of like a slap in the face.  Like all my hard work was for nothing.

Now, keep in mind,  I don't know this girl and she doesn't know me.  Just judged me - thankfully I have a great friend who stook up for me.  She has been with me through a hard part of my journey and has supported me through it all.  She is going through her own journey and knows a lot of my struggles.  I doubt that this girl would even care that I'm still mid transformation but it got me thinking....how many people see a fat person and think "lazy ass?  Stop eating!"

What that person doesn't know, is that the "fat" person they are judging, has already lost 50 lbs.   Worked out first thing that morning and turned down a doughnut for oatmeal.  Further more, how does that person not know that the "fat" person goes home and cries their self to sleep every night because despite their amazing progress, they are still considered disgusting in the eyes of society. 

People used to be judged by the color of their skin.  Now they are judged by the size of their pants.   I'm not saying being overweight is healthy - but EVERYONE deserves to be respected.  We don't know other peoples stories.  We don't know the struggles they got through, the pain they feel, or the self hate they deal with on a daily basis. 

The next time you decide to judge the "fat lazy" person, remind yourself that they have their own journey to go through.  Being overweight isn't just a physical thing - its also a very emotional thing.  When someone decides to start a journey to be healthy - so many things come into play.  WHY the weight was gained in the first place, eating behavior, change...so very many things.  Instead of judging, we should offer our help and support.  As for me and my booty...well, we'll keep trucking and I will one day get to where I want to be.

Anxiety of adding baby #2

Well, today I lost it.   I spilled some milk and the flood gates opened.  Literally.  Rod wanted some milk so I got him some.  Then I spilled it every where.  Cue the tears.  Then Rod started crying.  It was the sweetest, saddest thing.  I went to the bedroom, snuggled up with him and cried for about 10 minutes.  The last few days have been sort of tough.   The baby must be sitting on a nerve or something because my right leg is in a lot of pain. I can't quite describe it.  Not cramping, not contractions, just an achy pain.   I haven't been exercising because it hurts to walk, let alone exercise.  I rest when I can but lets face it...who can rest when they are chasing after a toddler.   My house is not as clean as I would like it.  It hurts to move.  So I guess lately I've been feeling like a bit of a failure. 
It really just sucks.   I'm stressed about taking care of things when I have two.  Actually - it wont be so bad at first.  My house was much cleaner before I had a toddler.  Everyone says things get crazy when the baby is born.  That's a lie.  Things get crazy when your little bundle of joy starts to move.  Then as toddlers they can reach higher and move faster.  lol.  I know God is blessing us with another wonderful gift, and Rod is getting a brother or sister but I can't help but feel scared.  It doesn't help when it feels like the whole world is "warning" you about two.

"Say goodbye to any free time you THOUGHT you had!"

"It's hardest going from one to two!"

"Have fun with a toddler AND a newborn"

And my favorite said in sarcastic tone, "Have fuuuuun" As if having two is the worst decision I could make.

Of all the negatives though, I did hear a positive.  On one of my "mom" pages on facebook, someone said one of the best things she could give her child was a sibling. If only everyone talked that positive!  Don't get me wrong, I get that adding a new baby to the family means major changes.  But it would be better to be set up with happiness than anxiety!  Am I making sense?    It's sort of like having Rod.  Everyone told me that it was going to be hard, and this and that.....and some days are.  But the good outweighs the difficult by far! 

Today was not a good one.  Well, Rod was actually pretty good.  I guess all the "little things" added up and the milk was the straw that broke the camels back.  I'm ashamed to admit that I ate crap.  I went to Dairy Queen for a heath blizzard and fries.  I completely ate through my emotions.  Now I'm sitting here feeling crappy because I could have made better choices.   Tomorrow is a new day.  Hopefully  the pain will go away (Midwife said it was normal and should soon) and I'll be able to work out and get some house work done.